Many couples miss their opportunity to ask important questions before marriage.
And I get it. When you are newly engaged and in love, it’s easy to overlook asking some of these important money questions before marriage. But the truth it, if you really love this person, you’ll be willing to put in some hard (and maybe a little awkward) work on the front end to have a thriving marriage.
Studies show money fights and money problems are the second leading cause of divorce, behind infidelity. It’s almost impossible to win with money when neither of you are on the same page with how to handle finances.
Let’s break down these five questions to ask before marriage so you’ll be ready for the conversation when the time comes!
5 Questions To Ask Before Marriage
Where do we stand on money?
As mentioned earlier, arguing about money is one of the biggest causes of divorce. Set your marriage up for success and put all the cards on the table –– no secrets! Come clean and get in agreement about where each of you stand on money. Are you in agreement in joining your money together once married? Are they a spender or saver? What is their view on debt or utilizing a credit card?
Do you have any debt?
This is probably the second most important question you need to ask! I’m not talking about, “oh –– I know he has some student loans from college.” What you really need to know is, “he’s got $49,000 in debt between student loans and a car note.” When you both lay out how much debt you are in, you can begin to plan out how to move forward with tackling that debt together once married.
What was money like in your household growing up?
Each home is unique, and every parent is different. For some, money is stressful and secretive. For others, it’s peaceful and positive.
How you grew up and the environment you were raised in shaped your money mindset and your habits with money in very specific ways. That’s why it’s crucial to examine your childhood. Growing up, more is caught than taught, and you absorbed a lot about money without even realizing it!
What kind of legacy do you want to leave with money?
Nothing will bring you and your significant other together like the power of dreaming. Dreams are the antidote to an unfocused life.
Do you dream about taking family vacations to make lasting memories for your kids? Or having enough money to go crazy and bless someone outrageously at Christmastime each year? Or when you’re gone, do you want to leave your loved ones a pile of money so big they can pursue dreams they never thought possible?
What are your financial goals?
What must be true in order for you to make your dreams a reality in your marriage? That’s the lens that you should look at your money through. If you have a dream of adopting someday, what would it look like to save up for that together? Maybe your dream is to leave your 9-5 and be a stay at home parent. Or you both have a goal to both retire early. How much do you need to be investing each month to hit that goal?
Have A Successful Marriage
Asking these five money questions before marriage will set you up for success! It gives you the opportunity to focus on the important things before you ever walk down the aisle. You can turn what are trouble spots for more people into areas of strength and success that will hold you together for a lifetime.
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